Travels with Grumpus

Maya: So who do you think would win in a fight? Batman or Wolverine?

Mickey: [dismissive snort] Batman, of course! He’s smarter than Wolverine.

Maya: Yeah I guess…

Mickey: Sweetie, Batman beat Superman! Wolverine would be child’s play.

Maya: Ok, so who do you think is crazier, Batman or Wolverine?

Mickey: Hmmmm. Tough call.

Maya: I think they’re equally nuts.

Mickey: Could be. But then Wolverine nailed Jean Grey so …

Maya: … so there’s a tiny bit of sanity in him. And all Batman had was that whore.

Mickey: Who?

Maya: Selina Kyle. Wasn’t she a prostitute?

Mickey: She became a jewel thief. But you’re right, she used to be a hooker.

Well Wolverine has mad fighting skills, an unbreakable skeleton and instantaneous healing powers, so I think it would be a pretty even fight.  So what happens when you take the crazy and the badass of Batman and Wolverine, remove the fighting skills and mutant powers, add in prestidigitation an obsessive, take-no-prisoners rivalry and a blonde wench? You get The Prestige. The movie also has Gollum, Alfred the Butler and David Bowie. So who’s more badass? Batman or Wolverine? Who looks better without a shirt? Answers - and spoilers - after the jump.

First off, let’s call it an even tie on the shirtless question.

On to the movie.

A long time ago, they used to be friends.

But somewhere along the line, someone lost a wife, someone lost two fingers, and in short order one gets into in a harness,

the other smolders intensely,

and then all hell breaks loose. Driven by obsession, competition, and plain old showbiz diva-ness, the rivals treat us to all sorts of sabotage, one-upmanship and diabolic set-ups. It’s the kind of epic rivalry that can only end with one of them dead.  But in true Christopher Nolan fashion, it actually it starts with one of them dead, and then ends with two of them dead… or is there more to this than meets the eye?

In between is the “ultimate magic trick,”

some fun stuff about electricity,

a human facsimile machine, and the plain and simple truth about magic.

So who won this one? It’s hard to say, because each magician paid a very high price for his obsession.  Batman was the one that walked away, but he did pay the higher price.  So was it the battle as a whole, or was it the finish line where you make the call?  You pick.